LORD, I WANT TO GET MARRIED NOW!
Remember those fairy tales of long ago? Where the handsome prince would fall in love with the beautiful princess and ask for her hand in marriage? That is the dream of every young woman, to marry the perfect person. The question is what happens when you get to your mid-thirties, and you are yet to find this person, yet you have been waiting eagerly for God to bring him along? Where could you be going wrong?
1. Where are you looking?
The short answer? Everywhere! Work, mutual friends, name it. These are all excellent places to look. Is that, however, where God wants you to look? Consider the following verses from Proverbs 3.
Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” (NLT)
These verses are saying to each young woman out there that all that is required is trust in God and seeking his will. Seeking his will involves being silent and listening to what he has to say to you. As you listen to him and read his word, he will reveal which direction you are to take, and where to look.
2. How are you looking?
For a young woman who is a believer in Christ, this can get tricky. You do not want to flirt in a suggestive manner. You want to uphold your integrity even as you socialize with prospective partners. In short, you need wisdom. Where is such wisdom found? Let us look at the Bible again for guidance on this.
Proverbs 2:6 “For the LORD grants wisdom! From his mouth come knowledge and understanding.”(NLT)
James 1:5 “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.” (NLT)
The wisdom that you need for this daunting task comes from God and is readily available to you. All you need to do is ask for it, and he will help you know how to relate to the opposite sex in a healthy manner. As you do so, people will respect you and even find the way that you conduct yourself quite attractive.
3. Why are you looking?
Most young women will say it is because everyone around them is married, their family members are pressurizing them to get married, or age is catching up with them. Now here is the thing. Those reasons are all very valid, but we need to remember that God made each one of us with a specific purpose to fulfill in our lives.
Psalm 139:16 “You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” (NLT)
These verses tell us that God had our whole lives planned out long before we were born. Our lives are therefore to be lived to bring glory to him. The desire to get married therefore has to be part of his plan for your life. The verses below shed more light on this.
Romans 12:2 “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” (NLT)
A young woman who desires to please God will let him transform her into a more godly person. As a result, her thought patterns will change, and she will see the big picture. God is more interested in us becoming more like him. As we become more like him, we can discern his will for our lives and see more clearly where he is leading us. The answer to why are you looking should, therefore, be, because God said so!
So what do we conclude? The desire to get married is real in many of us. The young woman who follows Christ should, however, try to approach this in a way that pleases God because he is the author of marriage. God’s will is that we are conformed to his likeness, and marriage is one of the avenues he uses. You as a young woman need to seek God and find out if this is his will for you. Surrender your desires to him, get busy with his work and keep your mind focused on him. The following words from Isaiah sum this up perfectly.
Isaiah 26:3 “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!” (NLT)
May the Lord help us to wait patiently on him for the perfection of his will in our lives.